...but lots of dreaming.
But, they're not the good kind.
We have Katelyn's six-month checkup with Dr's Ho and Tewari on Thursday, where we'll find out how her hip is looking (please let it still be in place) and if the previously-diminishing blood supply to the area has miraculously managed to reestablish itself over the past four months' since our last checkup.
It's been a tricky few months while we 'wait and see'.
The surgeons reckon we'll know, one way or the other, on Thursday. Katelyn will have another supervised x-ray and they'll be looking for a condition called avascular necrosis (AVN) - in simple terms - a loss of blood flow to the hip joint, which would, eventually, cause it to lose all mobility and die. Our last x-ray suggested a hint of the condition back in October, but the condition can sometimes correct itself, so we're beyond hopeful for that.
DDH continues to be a roller-coaster. On one side, we have what we've affectionately termed, 'the running girl' - our Kate doesn't walk anywhere, she runs - perhaps because for the sheer exhilaration and joy. We watch her like a hawk for the primary symptom of AVN - excruciating muscle soreness or stiffness - but, as we know, this is the girl who lived with the pain of an undiagnosed dislocated hip until her operation at 20 months, so we know that beyond the angelic face and the cheeky smile, there's a fighting spirit and unwavering stoicism. So many people share their delight in her achievements and her recovery, and I smile and agree - but, the reality is, I'm shit-scared about the potential AVN - and, especially, my inability to protect her from its development. Her operations, so far, have possibly just been service stops on the long surgical road to recovery, and I guess in the wakeful hours before dawn I'm yelling in my nightmares, "Stop the car, I'm wanna be sick!".
Till Thursday....xxx
